Twelve Things You Probably Didn’t Know You Could Do With A Fruitcake

This seems to be appropriate for all three Christmas Blogs we have here.  As long as we add an actual fruitcake recipe, this should be appropriate for Christmas Quotes, Christmas Recipes and Christmas Jokes.

And for the quotations lovers in the house here is a quote:

“Because I hate fruitcake.”
– Bonnie Napier – When asked why we had not posted any fruitcake recipes this year.

Twelve Things You Probably Didn’t Know You Could Do With A Fruitcake

1. Paint a few white and place them outside on the grass so people won’t park on your lawn.

2. Use it as building material. (This is actually what the Ancient Egyptians used to build the Great Pyramids.) 3. Keep one under your pillow for home defense.

4. Send one to the junk mail company with a note asking them to take you off their list.

5. It’s colorful, use it as a Yule Log.

6. Carve the Presidents’ faces in it and submit as a science or art project.

7. Give one to your boss and tell him it’s a life preserver.

8. Use it as a base for flower arrangements.

9. Donate to the local airport for use as airliner wheel blocks.

10. Grind a few up and give it back to your in-laws in a bag marked “lawn fertilizer.”

11. For a community project, sink a few in the ocean and build an artificial reef.

12. Tie one to each foot when you walk through deep snow to keep your feet dry.



  1. 1
    :) Suzy Says:

    Who came up with the recipe for these fruitcakes, anyway? Was it revenge by someone’s mother-in-law?

    I have another use for one. Paint them & add decoration ala “Martha”, and use it as a heavy duty door stop.

    Here’s another use — putting it by the entrance door as a commerative shoe scrapper.

    These cakes are not only multi-purpose — they will make the “eco-green” folks happy because you can recycle them. The gift that keeps on giving — as long as you don’t try to eat it! Has anyone ever heard from someone who has actually ate one of these things and lived to tell about it?

  2. 2
    Suzy :) Says:

    I just thought of another way to recycle these fruity cakes: Keep one on your nightstand to knock out intruders!

  3. 3
    Suzy Says:

    Just couldn’t help adding two more:

    ~ You could use them as book ends — especially, for holding up your cookbooks.

    ~ Oh, and I forget to mention they could be used as heavy duty paper weights.

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