10 Signs You’re Sick of the Holidays

10. You’ve got red and green bags under your eyes.
9. You’re serving reindeer pot pie.
8. When you hear, “Sleigh bells ring, are you listenin’?,” you
scream, “NO, DAMMIT! I’M NOT LISTENING!!!”
7. You climb on your roof and start shooting carolers in the ass with your BB
gun.
6. You think you hear your Christmas tree taunting you.
5. Instead of spending time with family, you’re watching some guy make
photocopies.
4. You’re busted for running through town wearing nothing but mistletoe.
3. You’ve got eggnog coming out of your ears.
2. Your standard response, “And happy holidays to you too, you bastard!”
1. Two words: tinsel rash.

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